Where did my sex drive go?

“I feel horny, but only for 1 week of the month. I am moody and irritable for the rest of the month and don’t feel like having sex. Why?”  – Rollercoaster Rhiannon

“I am a healthy 20-year-old and I am having a problem with my sex drive. It is extremely low and I don’t know what to do. I just cannot get into sex. I’ve tried everything, I’m always dry, and I never feel horny. Any suggestions? Could birth control pills cause this?” – Apathetic Amy

Unfortunately, and a little ironically, birth control pills do lower your sex drive. Side effects reported by women on the Pill are a lowered libido and fewer signs of sexual arousal, like a lack of vaginal lubrication. Talk to your gyno if there is a relationship between the two and ask about a different pill or an alternate form of contraception altogether.

The Pleasure Consultant recommends the IUD Mirena as a great alternative, it slowly emits synthetic progesterone into the uterus which does affect your libido, but in a different way to the Pill. It make you less moody and flat lines your hormonal cycle.  Ask for information and don’t believe them when they say you can’t have it inserted if you haven’t had kids yet. You can have it if you want it and it is a very effective form of contraception.  I had it inserted before having children, just demand a general anaesthetic & pay for it, not a local.

In addition to birth control, other forms of medication can put a damper on your sex life. If you recently started a new medication, talk to your doctor about side effects. Simply ask for something not related to sexual arousal (and definitely make sure to talk to your doctor before dumping any pills).

But…your condition may not be blamed solely on medications. A very common cause for a decrease in libido is fatigue. If you are stressed because of a hectic schedule, you understandably won’t be interested in sex. With piles of homework and exams or work pressures or deadlines, the last thing on your mind is having sex. Adequate sleep and relaxation will really help calm your busy life and may assist in putting you in the mood; or at least in the bed, even if it’s just for much needed sleep!

Meditation and yoga are always great relaxation methods and have shown to help increase sex drive. Talk about a win-win: a firm butt with a newfound horniness! 😉

Remember you are not alone when you feel flat. Many people go through periods in their life in which they get horny by just a simple touch or idea, while other times your arousal is about as non existent as John Howard’s hair.

Don’t focus on what your body isn’t doing because this just makes it worse. Don’t worry about the upcoming exam or project deadline: just focus strictly on the moment. The last thing your partner wants to feel is to feel you disconnected from them as they are exploring your body.  

Purr Clitoral Arousal Gel is a very effective product to help the female body get going.  For times of lowered libido or when you want to orgasm quicker or easier, try this Clit Gel.  It works to encourage dilation in the blood vessels in the clitoral area and therefore increase bloodflow.. which makes it easier to cum!

If you ever feel a little dry, don’t be afraid to use lubricant to get slippery action happening. Everyone now and again has a few kinks in their chain, but it’s nothing a few drops of oil can’t fix.  Water based Lube is suited for all types of play, including silicone toys, and Silicone Lube is excellent for natural vaginal or anal play (NOT TOYS).  When adults play a good quality lube is required.

Sourced from ‘The Naked Truth: where did my sex drive go?’ Adapted by Ana Snyman for PleasureConsultant.com

October 31, 2011  :   Angela McCoy  http://northernarizonanews.com/blog/author/angelamccoy/

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